My autobiograpy using food idioms

22 09 2010

My autobiography using food idioms
If I were to describe my life in a nutshell, I would begin by saying that the apple did not fall far from the tree. My father was in the U. S. Army and was accustomed to wolfing down his food before the drill sergeants could scream at him. I now have the abhorrent habit of eating my meal too quickly. I also inherited my father’s sweet tooth, but in that aspect, I am completely opposite in my behavior: I eat desserts as slow as molasses in January (obviously not in Puerto Rico of course).
My mother is truly the milk of human kindness. She helps everyone diligently and is known for being exceptionally compassionate towards stray animals. Even after she lost a daughter, she and my father did not cry over spilled milk for long, because I was born a year after her death. I now know that that is the way the cookie crumbles; you must persevere and take everything with a grain of salt or deal with years of sour grapes.
My life as a result of their love and support is quite nice. My husband brings a large chunk of the bacon home, and I hope that soon we’ll have enough saved up for our nest egg. My husband and I are quite different. He is as cool as a cucumber and I’m usually going bananas because I have too much on my plate. You would think that this would be a recipe for disaster, but it’s actually a piece of cake. I can butter him up quite easily: I mention video games. He is the apple of my eye and my bad apple all at once.
Some people say that you can’t have your cake and eat it too, but after one look at me, you’ll think I am on an all-cake diet.

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